When Avoidance Becomes the Problem: Understanding Trauma, Isolation, and Mental Health
If you're in crisis: Call 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) or Alaska Careline at 1-877-266-4357 for immediate support.
What Avoidance Actually Looks Like
Avoidance isn't just "not thinking about it." It's far more sophisticated than that.
It looks like:
Staying perpetually busy- overworking, overscheduling, never stopping long enough to feel anything
Numbing- substances, food, screens, anything that dulls the edges
Emotional detachment- going through the motions but feeling nothing, like watching your own life from behind glass
Relationship distance- keeping people at arm's length, never letting anyone get close enough to see the cracks
"I'm fine" when you're not- reflexive denial, even to yourself
Avoidance is brilliant adaptation. Your brain learned early that overwhelming pain could be managed by not looking at it directly. And for a time, that strategy saves you. There comes a point avoidance becomes maladaptive.
Why Alaska’s Winter Can Makes Things Worse
If avoidance is already your primary coping mechanism, Alaska's winter becomes a perfect storm.
Late January and February are when cabin fever sets in hardest. The novelty of the first snowfall is long gone. The holidays are over. Spring feels impossibly far away. And in Fairbanks, you're living in a world where daylight barely exists; just a few pale hours between long stretches of darkness.
Research shows that nearly 44% of Fairbanks residents experience subsyndromal Seasonal Affective Disorder (the "winter blues"), and 18.68% meet full diagnostic criteria for winter-pattern SAD; some of the highest rates in the nation. This isn't just feeling "a little down." Winter depression shows up as low motivation, isolation, disrupted routines, emotional numbness, and critically for people already avoiding trauma; intensified urges to numb with substances.
When the world goes dim, avoidance intensifies. You stop reaching out. You cancel plans. You tell yourself you'll "deal with it" when spring comes. But spring doesn't fix unprocessed trauma, it just makes it easier to keep avoiding for another year.
And in Alaska's rural areas and isolated homes, it's easy to disappear entirely. Friends stop checking in. Family assumes it's just the season. The isolation compounds. The walls close in.
When Avoidance Becomes Serious
Avoidance is one of the most common trauma responses and is considered a core symptom of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
Here's what most people don't realize: Avoidance doesn't just maintain the status quo. It compounds. Every year you avoid processing trauma, the cost gets higher:
Relationships can suffer. Partners, children, friends; they feel the distance, even if they can't name it.
Your emotional range can narrow. You're not just avoiding pain, you're numbing joy, connection, hope.
Physical symptoms can worsen. The body keeps the score. Chronic pain, sleep disturbances, autoimmune issues, gastrointestinal problems; unprocessed trauma shows up in your body.
Substance use can escalate. What started as occasional relief becomes a pattern, then a problem, then a dependency.
Mental health can deteriorate. Depression deepens. Anxiety intensifies. Suicidal ideation can emerge or worsen.
Alaska has one of the highest suicide rates in the nation with 27.6 per 100,000, nearly double the U.S. average of approximately 14 per 100,000. The burden is not distributed equally:
Alaska Native males ages 20-24 face a suicide rate of 61.8 per 100,000; the highest risk group in the state
Rural and small communities experience rates approximately 3 times higher than urban areas
Research shows that PTSD increases suicide risk 2-6 times
Childhood trauma significantly increases adult suicide risk
Substance use often mediates the pathway from trauma to suicide
Alaska has one of the largest veteran populations per capita in the nation; and veterans here face compounding risk. Alaska veterans die by suicide at a rate of 37.7 per 100,000, exceeding both the national veteran suicide rate of 33.9 and the overall national average. The transition out of military service creates a particularly dangerous window: in the first year after leaving the military, the veteran suicide rate reaches 46.2 per 100,000; and veterans who struggle with the transition to civilian life are five times more likely to experience suicidal thoughts. Add Alaska's winter isolation to that transition stress, and the compounding effect is significant. For many veterans and first responders, avoidance isn't just a habit; it's a trained survival response. "Tough it out" is a cultural mandate. And in Alaska's darkest months, that mandate can cost lives.
Here's the critical part: Research on suicide patterns in Alaska shows that suicide behavior peaks between April and August, not in the darkest winter months. February and March are the prevention window. This is when people are most isolated, most overwhelmed, most deeply entrenched in avoidance; and when reaching out for support can change the trajectory before spring arrives.
If you've been telling yourself, "I'll deal with this when I feel stronger," please hear this: You don't have to be strong enough first. The support is designed to meet you where you are.
The Hidden Cost of Waiting for the Right Time
There is no perfect moment to address trauma. There will always be a reason to wait:
Work is too busy
The holidays are coming
Winter is too hard
Spring is too busy
Summer is for enjoying
Fall brings new stress
The cycle repeats
Meanwhile, years pass. Relationships that could have been saved end. Career opportunities are lost. Your children grow up watching you survive instead of living. The emotional exhaustion of constant vigilance compounds. Avoidance has a compound interest. Every year you wait, the debt grows.
What Breaking the Pattern Actually Looks Like
Facing trauma doesn't mean white-knuckling through it alone. It doesn't mean you have to be "ready" or "strong enough" or "in the right headspace."
It means working with someone who understands trauma, who can create the structured safety you need to process what you've been carrying, and who won't leave you alone in the hardest moments.
EMDR INTENSIVE THERAPY is designed specifically for people who've been avoiding for years. It provides:
Concentrated time to work through trauma without the weekly interruptions that keep you stuck in the cycle
Structured support so you're not processing alone, you have a trained trauma specialist guiding you through every step
Time-limited commitment (1-4 days) instead of years of weekly therapy
Research-backed effectiveness for PTSD, complex trauma, and treatment-resistant presentations
You don't process trauma by thinking about it more. You don't heal by talking in circles for years. You heal by addressing the memories at the neurological level, with the right support, in the right environment.
And you don't have to wait until you "feel ready." No one feels ready. You take the step, and the readiness comes.
If You’re Reading This In Late Winter
If you're in anywhere in Alaska right now, and February feels unbearable, you're not imagining it. Late January and February are when cabin fever sets in hardest. Law enforcement and health care workers report higher instances of domestic violence and disturbances during these months.
The darkness is real. The isolation is real. The exhaustion of carrying unprocessed trauma through another brutal winter is real.
But you don't have to wait for spring. You don't have to survive another year telling yourself, "I'll deal with this later."
Later has a cost. And you deserve better.
Crisis Resources & Support
If you're in immediate crisis:
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline; available 24/7
Alaska Careline - 1-877-266-HELP (4357), 24/7 support
Text "HELLO" to 741741 - Crisis Text Line
Emergency: 911
Alaska Mental Health Resources:
SAMHSA National Helpline — 1-800-662-HELP (4357)
If you're not in crisis but recognize yourself in this:
Trauma Recovery Institute offers free 30-minute consultations to discuss whether intensive EMDR therapy or Elite Mental Toughness® might be appropriate for you. You can explore your options without commitment, ask questions, and determine if this approach fits where you are. More information: Trauma Recovery Institute
You don't have to carry this alone. And you don't have to wait.
Ready to Take the Next Steps?
If trauma symptoms are still interfering with your life despite consistent practice, it may be time to consider deeper trauma processing. Intensive EMDR therapy is designed to process and resolve trauma at its root; not just manage symptoms, but help heal the underlying wounds keeping your nervous system stuck in fight-or-flight.
Learn more about intensive EMDR therapy
Who I Help
I work with adults seeking evidence-based trauma recovery and resilience support, including:
military service members and veterans
first responders, including firefighters, law enforcement, and EMS
healthcare professionals experiencing burnout or compassion fatigue
high-stress professionals managing trauma exposure, chronic stress, or performance pressure
Services include EMDR therapy, EMDR intensive therapy, and Elite Mental Toughness® training designed to support trauma recovery and psychological resilience.
About Dr. Yvette Curtis
Dr. Yvette Curtis, PsyD, LPC, MAC is a licensed professional counselor, Doctor of Psychology, EMDRIA Approved Consultant, and Master Addiction Counselor with over 15 years of clinical experience treating complex trauma in military, Indigenous, and diverse populations. She specializes in EMDR intensives for PTSD, complex trauma, and treatment-resistant presentations, and has provided EMDR therapy since 2011. Dr. Curtis regularly writes about trauma recovery, EMDR therapy, and psychological resilience for military personnel, first responders, healthcare professionals, and other high-stress professionals.
Referrals and article shares are always welcome.
Related Articles
You might also find these helpful:
• How Trauma Changes the Brain and Nervous System
• Complex Trauma vs Depression
• What Is EMDR Therapy?
Related Trauma Recovery Articles
If you'd like to learn more about trauma, nervous system regulation, and evidence-based treatment, these articles may help:
• What Is EMDR Therapy?
• How to Calm Your Nervous System
• Why You Can't Sleep After Trauma
• 5 Signs You're Ready for EMDR Intensive Therapy
References
1. Drew, E. M., Nilan, K., Dillard, D. A., & Bode, K. (2021). Seasonal affective disorder and engagement in physical activities among adults in Alaska. International Journal of Circumpolar Health, 80(1).
2. Haggarty, J. M., Cernovsky, Z., Husni, M., Minor, K., Kermeen, P., & Merskey, H. (2002). Seasonal affective disorder in Alaska. American Journal of Psychiatry, 149(9), 1176-1182.
3. Wexler, L., Rataj, S., Ivanich, J., Plavin, J., Mullany, A., Walls, M., & Ridings, J. W. (2016). Seasonality of suicide behavior in Northwest Alaska: 1990-2009. Public Health, 137, 35-43.
4. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Center for Health Statistics. (2022). Multiple Cause of Death Data. CDC WONDER Online Database.
5. Alaska Department of Health. (2025). Alaska Suicide Data Summary Report. Division of Behavioral Health, Section of Prevention and Early Intervention.
6. Stop Soldier Suicide. (2024). Veteran Suicide Statistics.
7. Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. (2023). Mental Health and Substance Use State Fact Sheets: Alaska. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.
8. Akeela. (2025). Shorter Days Mean Heavier Struggles for Mental Health in Alaska.
9. Alaska Village Electric Cooperative. (2022). Bringing Light Into the Darkness.
10. Kim, Y. H., et al. (2025). Global prevalence of seasonal affective disorder by latitude: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Journal of Affective Disorders, 390, 119807.
11. Alaska Department of Health. (2023). Alaska Scorecard 2023: Key Issues Impacting Alaska Mental Health Trust Beneficiaries.
Photo by Erik Mclean
Disclaimer
This article is for educational purposes only and does not constitute psychotherapy, diagnosis, or treatment. Reading this content does not create a therapeutic relationship with Dr. Yvette Curtis or Trauma Recovery Institute. Dr. Yvette Curtis provides psychotherapy services to individuals located in Alaska. Individuals outside Alaska may participate in educational services or destination intensive therapy where legally appropriate. If you are experiencing thoughts of suicide or self-harm, contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline or seek emergency medical assistance.
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